The Coming Weeks

Thirty-six weeks yesterday. This last trimester seems to have flown by. Hard to believe in a month or less we will be snuggling this little munchkin. I hope it goes as quickly as have the past few weeks.

I wanted to take this opportunity to share some of my hopes and desires for this birth. My first two didn't go quite as planned. Our oldest son was born breech via an unplanned c-section. Our second was born via VBAC (vaginal birth after cesarean) which was what I wanted, but I had developed Cholestasis at 33 weeks and had to transfer care from my midwife to the OB. As of today, all is well. Baby is in the proper head down position, my c-section scar has healed nicely, and there is no sign of Cholestasis reoccurring. So long as no complications or emergencies arise, I will be giving birth with the assistance of a midwife.

We are currently planning a home water birth. I never thought I'd want a home birth, but something with this pregnancy was different. I knew I didn't want a standard hospital birth, but rather a midwife attended birth was my desire. I was convinced I'd be happy with a hospital birth with a midwife. Still, I asked my midwife about home births, at first out of curiosity, but then with real desire to make an informed decisions. I read other mothers home birth experiences and the beauty and peace they spoke of made me desire that experience for myself. I still had doubts and concerns with a home birth with this being my second VBAC.

And then I read The Absorbent Mind. Maria Montessori spoke of the trauma of birth and how everything is new to the infant. This is the child's first experience of its environment and it is our duty to make the transition as peaceful as possible. She also spoke of how mother nature provides the perfect opportunity to carry out this duty.

And the mother herself is kept helpless for a time. Keeping still for her own benefit, she communicates the necessary calm to her child. Everything happens as if the mother unconsciously realized the damage done to her baby. Holding him tightly, she gives him of her warmth, and protects him from too many sensations.
~Maria Montessori

This passage and the whole section on birth resonated with me. It's all over the web that birth is beautiful and empowering and all the power to women. Most of the world realizes the sacredness of birth, but mainly from the perspective of what the mother and her body has achieved. What we tend to forget is the other person who is directly effected by birth. Montessori brings this to light beautifully.

Birth is traumatic both for the mother's body and the baby in that the mother brings forth a new soul through pain and pushing and the baby is brought forth from the warm womb into a world full of new sensations completely foreign. Both are beautiful and sacred and need to be respected and protected in the postpartum-newborn stage. As the mother, I will be healing from a physically and mentally demanding experience. Rest is encouraged. In being made to rest and heal, I am given the opportunity to assist my baby in experiencing the same rest, healing, and calm. 

Midwifery care and a home birth are so compatible with this image. A home birth eliminates the need for movement after birth. The transfer from the hospital to home, settling into another, separate environment from the one they entered into, even dressing, is negated. With a home birth, peace and calm can begin from the moment baby is born with little to no interruption. The environment is prepared as I desire it and as is suitable for my infant. As for midwifery care, they are there strictly for the mother and baby. They will not be rushing the immediate post birth process to rush off somewhere else. Their attention is undivided and respectful of each moment that follows delivery. In the first week postpartum, the midwife does three home visits to facilitate staying in bed and resting, making it possible to maintain the peaceful environment and to simply be with baby and ones family.

A home birth is the only way I can imagine the birth of our third child taking place. This pregnancy started with anxiety and has seemed harder than my previous two with exhaustion, low iron, and the most weight gain. All I want is for this baby to be brought into this world in peace, for baby to know peace and calm. And what better time to start than the moment of birth?

~Emilie